#172. Break Boundaries and Ignite Your Intentional Life with John R. Miles

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Episode Transcription

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  00:00

Are you ready to embark on a transformative journey that blends logic and intuition? Dr. Joyce Anastasia, an intuitive consultant with a PhD in quantum natural medicine is here to guide you. With her unique approach. Dr. Joyce bridges the gap between the intuitive and the logical, creating a paradigm shift that amplifies your impact on the world. Through her Wisdom Teachings and effective natural processes, Dr. Joyce evokes your greatest strength and unlocks transformational possibilities. Her services include quantum and remote healing, past life regression, divine intuitive sessions, Dream exploration, and ethical manifestation from vision to reality. Imagine shifting from feeling oppressed and controlled to embracing vulnerability and authenticity, transition from fear to courage, from overwhelmed to peace of mind, feel empowered to make those formidable decisions to create optimal outcomes with no harm. Dr. Joyce helps you identify and overcome limiting beliefs through integrative works that span many traditions, recognizing and celebrating the uniqueness in each one of us. In a safe and confidential environment, Dr. Joyce provides support for those in high levels of leadership and academia. With her guidance, you can drop the need for control, make powerful decisions and to have the courage to discover what’s possible for you. Take responsibility for your life and find peace with Dr. Joyce, Anastasia, unlock your potential and start your journey towards a more conscious and empowered life today. So if you’re ready to drop the control file, go to www.leadbywisdom.com and unlock your full potential.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  02:34

It’s Marisa Lee here, and I’m so excited to be sharing today’s interview round episode with you. In these episodes, our brilliant lineup of guests will include healthcare practitioners, voice educators, and other professionals who will share their stories, knowledge and experiences within their specialized fields to empower you to live your best life. Whether you’re a member of the voice, community, or beyond your voice is your unique gift. It’s time now to share your gift with others develop a positive mindset and become the best and most authentic version of yourself to create greater impact. Ultimately, you can take charge, it’s time for you to live your best life. It’s time now for a voice and beyond. So without further ado, let’s go to today’s episode.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  03:45

Welcome to another episode of voice and beyond. This week, we have an incredible guest for you, John R. Miles. John is a keynote speaker, a combat veteran and the host of the number one ranked alternative health podcast passion struck with John miles, which has garnered over 17 million downloads from listeners in 169 countries. He is also the author of the acclaimed book, passion struck 12 powerful principles to unlock your purpose and ignite your most intentional life. Today, John will share some of the inspirational work from his book, which combines behavioral science research, peak performance strategies, and real life narratives from industry titans, such as Oprah, Elon Musk, Dwayne The Rock Johnson, and astronaut Wendy Lawrence just to name a few. Drawing from his his insights, experiences and the very essence of the human spirit. John navigates through self sabotage and doubt, to empower you to confront and transcend your limiting beliefs. This ultimately paves the way for a life without boundaries. recognized as one of the top thinkers in personal mastery, and a premier 100 leader. John shares how we can break free from the inner confines of personal limits, overcome the barriers that hold us back, and harness the transformative power of intentionality. John’s story is both timely and compelling. In an era where burnout, mental health challenges and the search for purpose are more prevalent than ever. John’s journey from corporate success to profound personal realization brings hope, inspiration and actionable insights. So if you’re ready to craft a life that truly matters, this interview with John miles is a master Listen, tune in and get ready to be inspired. So without further ado, let’s go to today’s episode.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  06:40

Welcome to a voice and beyond, we have a very special guest today we have John miles. How are you, John?

John R. Miles  06:49

Marisa, I am doing fantastic. Thank you so much for bringing me on your great show. It’s great to see you again.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  06:54

Tell us about your story. John Miles, who is John miles? And what is the journey that has led to you writing this book,

John R. Miles  07:04

Marissa, I guess you could say I’ve always been a person who has taken the road less traveled throughout my entire life. And I think that really started when I was a kid. And that five years old, was just playing tag in our side yard with a bunch of other children. And we kept getting rougher and rougher as we were playing as little boys do. And one of my neighbors just happened to catch me in the back right at the right time, or wrong moment. As it is and I went flying through there landed through our basement window and ended up getting a traumatic brain injury, which ended up causing a whole number of issues for me, including a spectrum of speech impediment, migraine issues, cognitive issues and finding words and using them properly. That other vision issues. And so even at a young age, I was forced to have to overcome resilience and choose whether I was going to play the victim or whether I was going to do something and find my way out of it because I was getting sick of the kids teasing me that I was broken in some way. So that really led this inner drive for me to want to make something out of my life. And so when I came to the time in life when I had to choose University, I made the choice again to go to the Naval Academy instead of your typical university. Yes, because I I thought it was a phenomenal place to foster leadership skills, I wanted to follow in the footsteps of my grandfather and my father, before me serve my country. And also I just figured I’m never going to have the opportunities and experiences like I would have from that starting my journey. And that’s exactly what happened. I ended up graduating, had a great time when I was in the service working for the National Security Agency got to deploy throughout all areas of the world saw my time in Iraq and in the Yugoslavia conflict, Northern Africa and other things. And the only reason I really left the military was because I had an opportunity to join the Federal Bureau of Investigation as a special agent and ended up having my Quantico class set up for about a week after I got out of the military. And unfortunately, our Congress was having some of the same inter fighting politics that were going on then. So they couldn’t pass a budget. And my class ended up getting canceled and recycled three years later. And by the time it came about, I had to move to Plan B because I had a kid at that point. And life had just taken a different turn. And so I spent the next six, seven years in management consulting when another unexpected turn happened. I was working as a practice leader. For Arthur Andersen, if people remember that firm, when Enron happened, and in a matter of weeks took the whole firm down. So then I had to do another unexpected pivot, which brought me to Australia, of all places, because I took a job working for LendLease. Oh,

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  10:22

yes, I know. LendLease. Yes, they’re big corporate property managers or leasing managers. Yeah,

John R. Miles  10:30

when I was with them, the company was a little bit different. It wasn’t just the construction business. We also owned MLC, which was sold to National Australia Bank. We also had a real event, real estate investment trust, and a whole myriad of different mutual funds. So it was both a financial services company and the property company that it’s known as today. In fact, at that time, Australia owned 50% of IBM, Asia. Wow, I didn’t know that. So yeah, it was a top 10 Australian Stock Exchange traded company at that point in time, lots have changed over the past 20 years. But I went from there to then Lowe’s home improvement, where I ended up being the head of all data, kind of what they call a chief data officer today by the time I left, and that springboard into me becoming a CIO at Dell computers. And then, following that, I really pivoted into private equity, and was a partner in a private equity firm and would go and lead the rebuilding of many of their companies. So I ended up becoming the CEO for three or four of the portfolio before eventually finding my way into what I’m doing now. So there

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  11:44

did come a point throughout that journey, where you say that you are feeling directionless, lonely and bored. So why do you think you started feeling that way? Because externally, you would have looked like you had a very successful, a great life going on. But there must have been something missing intrinsically. So when was that moment of Self Realization? And how did you pinpoint what was actually going on with you?

John R. Miles  12:16

I think I was facing what many people are facing today, this feeling that Henry David Thoreau, all the way back when he wrote on Walden, that the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. And that’s how I actually felt I had wound up in what I consider to be kind of a portfolio career, moving up the ladder, doing different things to try to make more money gained titles do all the things people do in corporations. And it was so foreign from anything that I even dreamt of doing. When I was a kid. When I was a kid, I kind of dreamt of being a professional sports athlete, or being an FBI agent, like I thought my career was gonna go or being in the military, something where I was not just sitting behind a desk, but we had a more action filled life. And when the plan B was put into effect, I found myself on this path that after a good 12 to 15 years into it was anything but fulfilling for me. In fact, it had reached a point where I was just waking up every single day, and just dreading to go to work. Because once I had achieved becoming a C level, almost all the things that I had a passion for doing the creative aspects of my life being hands on, in in shaping things. All were removed as I was dealing more and more with politics across the organization, Human Resources issues, and really, financial management of a billion and a half dollar budget. But I wasn’t doing the things that really lit me up inside. Yes. And I found at work, it was just a myriad of meetings, politics, emails, and stress upon stress, and working 80 to 100 hour weeks, every single week, traveling two weeks out of the month, overseas because I had staff in 15 different countries and five continents. So it was just a life that I think on the outside looking at the resume look glorious, if you didn’t understand yes, what it was like actually living it. And when your life gets out of balance, like was happening with me, you start making sacrifices along the way. And it’s one of those things where I’m not going to work out today because I need to get this done. And then that leads to it making it easier to say that the next his time and then yes, you start losing your eating habits when you’re on all these global trips, and you’re not eating the healthy diet that you’re supposed to. And so all of a sudden, other areas of your life get completely out of whack. Yes. And I just found myself in complete inner turmoil. And when you don’t catch yourself quickly enough, when that’s happening, you can really go from kind of a midline baseline to all of a sudden just spiraling out of control, especially if burnout starts compounding things which it did for me. And so I just found myself in a position where I just felt, at one point completely numb, and that I was just going through the motions, and that nothing I was doing seemed like it was really holding any weight or creating any significance in my life. And it’s a that’s a terrible place to be. And I think that’s exactly what Henry David Thoreau meant when he said quiet desperation, because you feel like you were just stuck, and you can’t figure out how to break free.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  16:03

I would imagine there’d be a lot of people listening to what you’re saying, right now, they may not be in a corporate job, but would be feeling what you’re describing. Because so many people go through the motions every day, they’re in jobs that they absolutely do not want to get out of bed for. And I the word congruent, was coming to mind. You weren’t living a congruent life to who you were meant to be and the things that you wanted to aspire to do in your life. Most people stay stuck in that. But how did you get yourself out of that? I mean, that would have taken a lot of courage to leave such a high paying job where, obviously you had no financial problems. And as you say, on paper and observing your life from the outside would have been Wow, this guy’s got it all travel money. A fantastic job. So how did you overcome those challenges? And what steps did you take to make change in your life? Well,

John R. Miles  17:17

Marissa, I don’t care. If you’re making millions of dollars, or you’re making $80,000, no matter where you’re at, it seems extremely difficult to do something different when you’re so accustomed to living the life that you are. Yes. And I just want to put a figure out there, I’m in Gallup, in the past years, has shown that there are over 900 million people in 142 countries who feel unfulfilled. Oh, about what they do in life. And when they say 900 million, they’re measuring that against the 1.2 billion full time workers, which means 900 million out of 1.2 billion feel unfulfilled. So this is a really pervasive issue.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  18:07

Yes. Wow. That’s an incredible figure. Yeah. And

John R. Miles  18:11

so for me, it was really coming down to understanding that I wasn’t living authentically. And I came to the stark realization that the quest for authentic living was completely on the other spectrum of the life I was leading because it’s not about the superficial pursuit of monetary pleasures. It’s not about the status symbols that we get. To me, it became a deeper rebellion against societal norms that dictate so many of our lives, and, for me became a refusal to settle for a life that was being defined by someone else’s standards. It was really breaking away from quiet desperation, and reclaiming the power to author my own story and to create the life that I wanted. And I got here because when I was at this period of brokenness, I started doing some of the most crucial work around mindfulness and self awareness, and really relearning who I was, and what brought me joy, and fulfillment in my life, I had to get back to the basics of understanding what made me unique, and how do I exploit that and serving others, I had started to hear this inner voice that was telling me that I was supposed to start helping, the beaten, the battered, the broken, the lonely, the hopeless, the board of the world, but I had no idea what that meant, nor how does a person who’s a business executive start doing that, like what am I supposed to be offering who are even these people And so I really started to go down this journey of what I talked about in the book is crafting a new life for myself. And I use the analogy which many people in Australia will understand of being an angler, I call it the mission angler. Because when I go fishing, and some of the best fishermen I know, they treat it as a true art form. And they are extremely intentional about it from Yes, waking up early, pre planning their days ahead, doing the research on currents on moon phases, where the fish are going to be located, how far they need to go out in the ocean to find the most plentiful, when are the fish going to be biting? I mean, all these different things that they’re intentional about yet, how many of us are that intentional about the life we’re trying to create for ourselves? Very few. And so that’s what it really became, for me is this exercise of I had my actual self, I had found myself living as my odd self, meaning who I thought I should be, because of all the obligations I felt were on my shoulders, but it’s then how do you start bridging that gap between the odd self that you’ve become and the ideal self that you aspire to be? And to me, this really, is the whole book exploration of then how do you build yourself into that fulfilling life that you aspire to have? Yes. And it all really starts and ends with, you’ve got to find what your uniqueness is. And the problem that you were called to solve that only you have the uniqueness to solve? Hmm,

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  21:55

there were a couple of things that were coming to mind as he was speaking, and you were sharing your orange journey. And you said that there was an inner voice that was speaking to you, in order to hear an inner voice, you have to stop and listen. And most of us today, are just chasing after a result. And you talked about the fisherman and you were talking about intention, but that the word process was coming to me also, that those fishermen, I bet you, it’s not just about catching the fish, it’s about every one of those steps and enjoying the process of getting to that stage of fishing and actually having the fish on the end of the hook. And people today seem to just be after results. They after the result, they don’t stop and enjoy the process along the way. They’re not intentional in the way they live their lives. But they don’t stop and listen, either. They don’t celebrate things. I mean, we really are living in a society where everyone’s just on this mad rush. And there’s burnout, there’s stress, there’s anxiety, and, you know, good on you for taking that step and removing yourself out of that situation. And having that foresight to do it. You know, we’re in a compare and despair society here. And a lot of that is through social media, where people are looking at the way other people are living their lives, and wanting to live that same life, and not being true to who they are, and not being congruent. I mean, there’s so many things we can talk about here. But I really want to move on to your book. So you’re offering us some of the things that you use some of the tools and the tips that you use to get yourself back on that life of living congruent. So your book passion struck 12 powerful principles to unlock your purpose and ignite your most intentional life. So as I said earlier, the book was released in February. It combines behavior science, research and peak performance strategies. So we clearly know the inspiration of the book. So tell us about the book itself, how its arranged and what the 12 principles are that you talk about through the book.

John R. Miles  24:42

The book is really arranged around something that I call the passion struck model, and it’s made up of four components. So section, one of the book is all based on six principles that all orient around mindset shifts and the minds Set shifts are extremely important because it is your mindset that really dictates the why that you end up taking the actions that you do. And it influences the how the second section of the book goes into behavior shifts. And the behavior shifts also equate to six principles. And they build upon the mindset shifts. And this is really the what you’re taking action against, and how you’re doing it. And then the last section of the book I call the psychology of progress. But it’s really about the interplay of taking deliberate action, and the important fuel of intrinsic motivation. So that is how you put these 12 principles into the micro choices that make up your daily life. So it’s how all those things come together, and especially how intrinsic motivation is the fuel that brings all of it into this fluid cycle. And all of it overarching underpins our sense of mattering, and a feeling of significance that we have in the world. So with that as the backdrop, each one of the principles, I go through kind of a short, almost parable, or metaphor, describing it, I then go into kind of the behavior science or psychology behind the principle, I then introduce a personal story of how it’s impacted my life. And then I go into two examples in each chapter, some actual have more than that, of how some well known people, such as Dwayne The Rock Johnson, or Oprah Winfrey, and other less well known people have implemented this in their lives because I didn’t want people to think that you had to be that star power to put these principles into action. And so I have people like that to emphasize the points, but I also have what I call everyday heroes throughout the book as well, to show how regular people transform their lives using the principles.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  27:13

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John R. Miles  29:45

the first six principles are really all about personal reinvention. And it starts with becoming the mission angler that I was talking about, which is all really the art of life crafting and then at the end of it, I’ve got some Chapter exercises that lead you down the path for how do you discover your purpose? How do you ignite it with passion? How do you go about finding your ideal self? How do you explore your uniquenesses and then I provide QR codes as well, that you can go to additional assets that I have available for even more information. And then from there, I really then go into this next chapter on what it means to become a brand reinvent her and why. As I examined over 750, different luminaries across all aspects of academia, to CEOs, to war heroes to astronauts, the one thing I found consistent in addition to them following these 12 principles was that they all constantly reinvent themselves. And a lot of times, we feel like we’re going to reach a point in life. And then we stay stagnant there. These people don’t do that they constantly are reinventing themselves. So once they reach a plateau, and they cross it, they set out their next plateau, learn more and take on that next phase in life. And then it leads you into other things that you need to learn, such as how to put up proper boundaries to avoid toxic people and environments, how to overcome self doubt, how to use your perspective as a weapon, and why it’s so important to learn the importance of dreaming your dream, and not trying to dream someone else’s. That is

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  31:36

all really powerful stuff. So powerful. And I absolutely relate to so much of what you just talking about, then, one of the things about that reinvention, that’s really interesting, because you think that people that have made it in a certain area of their lives, that they would be happy and fulfilled to stay there. But you say that they keep reinventing themselves. So is that because they’re trying to seek new purpose through live?

John R. Miles  32:06

Well, I think it’s, some of that is there, but I think it’s more that they understand that to stay on top and to be at the top of their game and to continually living a life that’s passionate struck, because becoming passionate struck isn’t an end state, it’s an ever evolving version of yourself, that’s constantly striving to improve. So it’s a focus on reinventing, to improve every area of yourself. And so it’s this never ending process where you’re constantly trying to learn to become better, because we all have ebbs and flows in our lives. And so it’s recognizing those, and when you’re hitting them, and maybe when you’re not finding that you have that motivation, or that you need a new challenge, and doing the things that you need to do to reinvent yourself, to reposition yourself to, as you said, potentially follow a new purpose or to double down on the one you have, but doing it in different ways. So

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  33:11

with this book, what would you say is the greatest message that you’re wanting to deliver?

John R. Miles  33:18

I think the greatest message is that we don’t have to put limits on how we perceive we have to live our life. And it all starts and ends with if you want a 10x version of yourself, you have to start becoming that 10x version that you strive to be. And so a big area of the book then becomes how do you lessen the activation energy that it takes to do just that. And if you think about this on a chart, or one side is energy, and the other side is intentional action, just think of the metaphor of a person who’s having to roll their car up the hill. And as they’re doing it and pushing it up the hill, that activation energy is extremely robust, because you have this huge force that’s hitting you and you’re trying to push it uphill. But if you think that then you’ve got the apex of the hill and then you’ve got a downhill after it. Once you get that momentum going, your activation energy lowers. So one of the key things is then how do you figure out on the actions that you need to take to pursue the life that you want that you lower the activation energy that’s required to fuel those actions, because actions build upon themselves actions, create other actions, and that’s what builds the foundation. So it’s really learning how do you reduce that activation energy so that you lessen the friction? for you to take continuing action to build that foundation upon which you can then take your life to wherever you want it. So it’s built,

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  35:09

it’s creating a momentum. It’s like being that train that’s unstoppable in your life being that you have this lifeforce, and you’re just propelling yourself forward and with the least amount of energy as possible.

John R. Miles  35:27

I mean, that’s part of it. And I think it’s also you need a measurement system. But you’ve got to put the right measurement system in place. Benjamin Hardy, who’s a psychologist wrote a great book a couple of years ago called the gap in the game. And so many of us when we’re measuring ourselves, we measure ourselves in the gap, meaning, the incremental progress that we make, we’re constantly comparing ourselves to others around us. And so it would be as even though I’m a successful podcaster, who would be me trying to compare myself to Tim Ferriss, or Joe Rogan, or even Jay Shetty, I’ve been doing it much longer than I have, who’ve had much greater success. And if I keep comparing myself to their achievements, I’m constantly going to be in the gap, when we really need to realize is that we need to compare ourselves in the gains. And this is when you look back at prior versions of yourself, and you look at the progress that you’ve made incrementally along your growth pattern. And those are the gains that you’ve made. And I think it’s a natural tendency to want to compare, but it’s a huge mistake, because the only person you should be comparing yourself to are the leaps that you’ve made. Yes, where you once were to where you want to become. Exactly,

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  36:49

exactly. And this book is backed by science. Tell us about that. You said that you research do you had a lot of people contribute to the book, how did you conduct that kind of research. So

John R. Miles  37:05

really started out with me working for a different company, where I was the associate publisher for a publication they were doing, and I came up with this idea that I wanted to start spa spotlighting leaders in the business world. And so I started going down this path of creating these eight to 10 different components that made a person a bold leader. And as I started to look at this, and we started finding similarities in these eight to 10, attributes, I started to naturally want to understand where they also successful in their personal life, and what set that apart. And so it really led me down this journey of starting to start understanding what were these different characteristics that made people feel fulfilled in life and allow them to get over self doubt, to put up the boundaries that they needed to to understand the power of being alone in our thoughts? Because we’re completely immersed in the values that we have, and we’re not allow, and we don’t allow ourselves to teeter from them. Like, what were these things that made people so strong, and I ended up coming up initially with about a list of 30. And as I started studying more and more individuals, the list ended up getting up to about 750, I found 12 That seemed to resonate more and more on a repetitive basis across the board. And those made up the principles in the book. I kind of did it backwards, because at this point, I was really looking at neuroscience, primarily as psychology. Secondarily, when about four years ago, I got really introduced to behavior science and realize that neuroscience is fantastic. But neuroscience really explains a longer term eventuality of our behavior where behavior science can allow a person to take quicker action to fulfill the direction they wanted. And so I started to go down this path of just absorbing myself and as much behavior science as I could, which led me to want to start interviewing every renowned behavior scientist or psychologist who was in that field that I could and so I ended up interviewing about 50 or 60, behavior scientist along the way. And it just so happened that every single chapter is backed by behavior signs, and I was able to incorporate those interviews into the book.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  39:56

Well, so that’s really quite rigorous. there, and you recruited people like Oprah, the rock, how would the Hey, how did you find dealing with those people?

John R. Miles  40:11

Or some of these mask

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  40:12

as well? Yeah.

John R. Miles  40:15

Yeah. So some of these people i i candidly interviewed some of them I didn’t. So for instance, I did not get an opportunity to interview. Oprah. I did interview Elon Musk. I did interview General McChrystal, Keith crotch Jim McKelvey, who started square and a whole bunch of others, but there were some I tried to get access to, but I couldn’t. So I learned everything I could about them, and then use them in the book. Right.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  40:46

Incredible. Was there one of them that you thought, Well, I wasn’t expecting that response, or someone who really inspired you through their responses?

John R. Miles  40:59

Yeah. I think Jim McKelvey is a great example of that. Jim, is the founder, as I said, of square, the payment system with Jack Dorsey. And I think what was really remarkable about Jim, is just how learned he is in understanding how successful people operate and what makes successful entrepreneurs and non successful entrepreneurs. And it really comes down to finding this burning problem that you were kind of born to solve. But that’s not enough. Because what ends up happening is oftentimes we find that problem. But over time, as other things come up in our lives, we lose focus on it. So it was really this immense focus and dedication that you have to have to it. Even when things don’t seem like they’re going well. And they might be completely off the rails. You don’t give up on it, you double down and you keep pushing forward. And it was that discipline that he had used on numerous startups that was really enlightening to me.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  42:15

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Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  44:54

A lot of people would be listening to this and thinking you know you’re talking about Astro notes and you’re talking about all these highly successful people. But I’m just someone who works in a store or like me, I’m a singing teacher, and they have a little podcast on the side, you know, how does this relate to my life? And a lot of people would be going through the motions every day in their lives and not having that self realization that, you know, they could be doing more they could be achieving more. So how do people go from where they’re at? And how would the book benefit them.

John R. Miles  45:36

So I think a lot of this comes down to self love, honestly. Because if you don’t love the person who you are, you’re never going to have the confidence to expand the horizons of what you think is possible. Because you need to have that confidence in yourself, that you can do whatever it’s going to take to achieve your goal. And even though I highlight people like these astronauts, I mean, a great example of this is one of them. My profile in the book is Chris Cassidy. And Chris has a remarkable resume, Navy Seal, Bronze Star with valur, selected as an astronaut becomes the chief astronaut, is known as having more spacewalks than any other astronaut, but maybe five or six other living ones. And he’s now the head of the Medal of Honor Museum in the United States. But when I first met Chris, he was 17 years old. And we were doing push ups next to each other in goose poop at three o’clock in the morning, in the military together, and oh. And when I talked to Chris even now, and I look at what has allowed him to live the life he has, it’s because of the self love that he emulates, and he gave himself permission to take the chances that ended up resulting in where he is right now. And part of that was making difficult choices, such as when he was in seals that when he was at Budds, basic underwater demolition school that he might get kicked out for a medical issue, he might get kicked out. Because he can’t pass it academically, but he is not going to drop out. Because mentally he’s not strong enough. It was him as he was a seal, charting the path that if he even wanted a chance to become an astronaut, what were the things that he needed to do to put himself in best position to do that, which for him meant he needed, he needed to get an advanced degree. And he wanted to get into MIT. So it was then doing whatever he needed to do to get accepted. And then even when he was there, it was then understanding how do you put the application process and to become the astronaut. And then even when he became it, it was the desire that he wanted. He wanted to spacewalk. So he knew, in order to do that, he had to become the best at it that he possibly could. So it was just this intentional drive the whole way through his life, to understand what he needed to do, and to lower that activation energy that I was talking about, so that he had the self confidence to take that momentum forward, take the actions that he needed to, to build upon itself to evangelize what he wanted to become. And I mean, that’s an extreme example, but it’s the same thing that we need to do. And I think what people don’t realize, and you mentioned music, I’m right now starting down the path of trying to teach myself again, how to play guitar. And I was listening to Tim Ferriss talk about this, because he’s trying to teach himself how to play drums, I already know how to play drums. But what he said, and it’s absolutely true, is that if you do something 15 minutes a day, throughout the year, and you’re consistent with it, you’re going to be better at that activity than 97% of the rest of the world. And just 15 minutes a day, every single day.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  49:31

And that is achievable. You everyone can find 15 minutes a day. They can you know really, they

John R. Miles  49:39

can so it’s it’s just how you’re utilizing your time. So I mean, you could be using 15 minutes a day to listen to babble if you want to learn how to speak Spanish, and it’s the consistency of doing that on a regular basis that makes all the differences in the world. There’s this isn’t rocket Science, if you want to have better health, it’s being consistent about the food that you’re putting in your body, the nutrients that you’re putting in the exercise that you’re getting. It’s the same thing in Chris’s story. Except he realized that in order to reach where he needed to reach, he needed to be mentally strong, and he needed to be physically strong, he had to constantly learn. And it’s just realizing that you have to do all these things and be consistent in their application. Yeah,

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  50:27

I find with my students say that I teach at a university level. And the greatest obstacle that my students deal with, is limiting belief is breaking down those limiting beliefs is that something that you find is also a problem within our society that we do walk around with these limiting beliefs that hold us back from living the life that we truly want to live or achieving those things that we want to achieve? Yeah, I

John R. Miles  51:03

believe we all become our own visionary arsonist. And a visionary arsonist, I love bet is someone who with the best of intentions for personal growth and achievement inadvertently undermines their own progress. And I think what happens is we set these big ambitions, these high ambitions, we dream big, but then we end up engaging in behaviors that are counterproductive to the goals. It’s similar to programming a destination into your GPS, but then repeatedly taking detours that lead you farther away. Yeah. And it’s not due to a lack of desire, or ability. It’s the result of unconscious behaviors that are misaligned with our intended objectives. Hmm. Yeah. And, to me, a great example of this is if you have someone who’s listening to this, and they want to improve their fitness, but then they engage in procrastination, or negative self talk, that demotivates them despite their genuine desire to live healthier, their actions are driven by fear, or unexamined habits that lead them away from the gym routine, or healthy eating plan. Whatever it is, because there are sending the very things that they want to achieve in life. So signs that you’re actually a visionary arsonist include perfectionism, setting unrealistic goals, procrastination, negative self talk, avoidant behaviors, it’s when your actions consistently contradict your personal aspirations, leading to frustration, and then a sense of being stuck.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  52:40

And a lot of that, too, comes from lack of self love to exactly, there’s that, you know, your self worth, also thrown into the mix there. So we’re gonna start winding this up. This has been incredible. And I’m really inspired. I’m going to go and get your book, John. So what is your legacy here?

John R. Miles  53:06

So I wrote this for a wide group of people, because I wanted this to inform many different camps. So I actually dedicate the book to my kids who at the time that I wrote it, my daughter was 17. And my son at the time was 23. They’re now 20, and 26. But I wanted it to be a guidebook for this generation that’s coming up in a world that is far different from anything that our generation faced. I mean, the worries that they have about AI and digital changes, and how quickly they’re going to have to adapt or like nothing that we have seen in our lifetime. Yeah. However, what I tried to tell my kids is that when I was growing up, I had huge fears myself, there are different fears. But I went into life thinking, I’m never going to be able to live the dream life that I saw my parents live, I’m never going to be able to buy the house that they had. And if you live in that mode, you’re never going to do it. So it’s how do you create a different mindset of how you’re approaching your life. And so that’s what this book really does for that group of people as it helps give them the keys to how do they approach their life and build it in a way that’s going to make them resistant to the hardships that are coming their way and teach them how to become a Constant Learner. If you’re someone who’s stuck, it will teach you how to go from being stuck like I was to becoming passion struck. How do you what is the formula from going and feeling like you’re in quiet desperation to breaking free from it. If you’re a high achiever, you can look at the principles and figure out where you sit by taking the passion for our quiz, and then use it as a tool. set to take you to the next level you want to achieve. So it can fit. I wrote it so it would fit multiple groups on their journey.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  55:09

What did you learn about yourself through this process? Was there something that you thought, wow, you know, I didn’t realize this about myself. All these years, I thought I was John miles. And this is the person that I thought I was. But wow, I’ve discovered this through this journey of writing the book.

John R. Miles  55:33

But one of the things that I discovered is that real growth is actually like farming. It’s not instant gratification. And it requires you to have consistent effort and practice, leading to exponential returns over time. And what I have learned from all the science that I’ve studied and seeing what works and doesn’t is you have to be intentional about how you align your actions with your ambitions, and your long term aspirations. And to start seeing that the lols and the plateaus, on the way to achieving those ambitions, and then aspirations are not failures, but stages for future growth. But the most important thing is the power of choice. And it’s not the big choices I have found in life that end up defining us. It’s the myriad of micro choices that we make on a daily basis, that either lead to a tsunami of greatness or a valley of despair, because we end up being consistent and making the wrong choices, or we become consistent, and making choices like I talked about with Chris Cassidy that build upon each other. So it’s really learning how to start lessening that activation energy so that you’re making more and more of these micro choices that build upon each other become easier over time, and become more windfall than a headwind.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  57:03

Is there anything else that you wanted to add to this interview that perhaps we haven’t touched on and you feel is important that you’d like to contribute? Or that you feel our listeners should know about?

John R. Miles  57:16

Yeah, one of the favorite chapters that I have in the book was on something that I call the conscious engager. And we often hear people say, I’m living my life on autopilot. And I think some people are, but I think for the vast majority of us, it’s the wrong metaphor. Because I’ve spent a lot of time over the past couple of weeks on airplanes, and I guarantee the pilots who are flying it probably 90% of the time, they’re on autopilot. And when I think of autopilot, yes, you’re going through the motions, but you’re typically heading in a positive direction. I think the better analogy, which I define in this chapter for how so many of us are living our lives, is as if we’re a pinball. We were living a pinball life. We’re as if we are that unintentional pinball in the game. That is just bouncing off everything that’s around us. And the digital apparatus that has come over the past decade, the social media tools, everything is just making this pinball life easier and easier to fall into that trap. Yes. And so really what life then the better analogy is, instead of letting the game play you, because the game of life is similar to pinball? I mean, it really is. Yes,

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  58:41

because we’re kind of like bouncing off all these different, we’re hitting obstacles, aren’t we in life,

John R. Miles  58:48

right. So the critical thing that that I found was that ultimately, what I discovered when I was at that low point in my career was I had become extremely fantastic at making other people’s dreams come true. And being the pinball bouncing around other people’s games, but I wasn’t being intentional about taking control of the pinball and playing it intentionally in the way that I wanted to meaning. I was so good at making other people’s dreams come true. I wasn’t making my own dreams come true. And that is really the whole purpose of our whole discussion today in this book, is how do you intentionally become the player of the game of pinball to influence winning the game and playing it on your terms?

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  59:44

I love that. I love that because people don’t realize that they’re being influenced by other people, whether it is something on social media, whether it’s the people around them, whether it’s in their job, there’s all the He’s external influences. And we have to really be true to who we are and what our mission and what our own purpose is in life. John, thank you so much. We are going to share the links to your book to you, if people want to learn more, what are you up to next.

John R. Miles  1:00:19

So, right now I am working on trying to get a book tour underway, which I hope could become a global book tour been trying to really hone my keynote apparatus. So I can start doing those, again, on a much larger basis. I’m currently working on what I call the passionate struck University, which is taking the principles that are in the book and turning them into an app and online courses that people can utilize to augment that book even more. And I’ve been really fortunate I was recently picked up as part of the Sirius XM network. And so I’m looking at expanding the podcasts that I’m doing now, with the passion start podcast and bringing on some additional podcasts under that umbrella.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  1:01:11

Amazing well done to you. I wish you all the very best. And I do appreciate your time. And people go out and buy John’s book. I’m gonna go and buy it. It sounds amazing. And I resonate with so much of what you were speaking about on the show today. All the very best. John, thank you very much for your time.

John R. Miles  1:01:36

Yeah. Marissa, thank you so much for having me. And I really appreciate the Australian audience. I loved my time when I was there in Sydney, one of the best places and best countries in the whole world. So yes, thank you for having me on.

Dr Marisa Lee Naismith  1:01:51

Thank you. Take care, John. Thank you so much for listening to this episode of a voice and beyond. I hope you enjoyed it as now is an important time for you to invest in your own self care, personal growth, and education. Use every day as an opportunity to learn and to grow, so you can show up feeling empowered and ready to live your best life. If you know someone who will also be inspired by this episode, please be sure to copy and paste the link and share it with them. Or share it on social media and use the hashtag a voice and beyond. I promise you I am committed to bringing you more inspiration and conversations just like this one every week. And if you would like to help me please rate and review this podcast and cheer me on by clicking the subscribe button on Apple podcast right now. I would also love to know what it is that you most enjoyed about this episode and what was your biggest takeaway? Please take care and I look forward to your company next time on the next episode of a voice and beyond.